The Great Scholar: Day One

If God loves me, a corkscrew will be at the top of this box.

I say this as I slice open one of two yet-to-be unpacked boxes stacked in my bedroom. I don’t even remember what I put inside them a month ago.

My first night of classes was a sweaty nightmare, where I got my classes confused – believing a Thursday class met on Wednesday; THEN getting lost trying to locate aforementioned Thursday class on Wednesday; THEN, once finding the classroom, realizing no one was there; THEN having to find the information desk to find out where the class was meeting, only to be told that Kelly Wolfe – you great scholar you – the class meets on THURSDAY not WEDNESDAY; THEN having to ask the woman at the information desk what class I was actually supposed to be at; THEN, realizing I had forgotten which classroom the woman told me to go to as soon as I walked away; THEN having to go back to the information desk and ask again; THEN having to take with me a massive, color-coded campus map marked – humiliatingly – with big black Xs and arrows.

I pour the wine and remember that this is what I said I wanted. This is everything I said I wanted.

The good news is God loves me.